X is for X-Rated

In a recent interview with Pamela Stitch which you can read and listen to HERE, I was asked the following;

In ‘A love rekindled’, we see more explorations of adult themes compared to ‘A heart to mend’. I am talking about sex scenes - how was it writing those sex scenes?

I replied that it was like any other writing. I mean sex is part and parcel of life and relationships, and my books are all about that. I also added that I had three other sex scenes in the book which were cut when I was editing because I believe sex in writing should move the story forward.

Today for that hard letter X in the A - Z challenge, I bring you one of the deleted scenes. Writing for me is about connecting, making my readers feel - cry, laugh, think, and enjoy. Yesterday I made some of you cry, today, allow me to ..........

W is for Writing - Inspired by A Love Rekindled

Do you remember Twin Bonds from Honing my Short Story Skills? The complete and edited version was published today on Bellanaija.com.

I buttoned my tuxedo, and looked back with a tight smile at the man who stood behind me. The wedding was in an hour, but it wasn’t nerves at seeing my lovely bride that choked my throat. Painful memories swamped me from all sides. My best man was supposed to have been my brother, my twin brother, Odion. Our plan was either to get married on the same day, or be each other’s best man.

Odion and I were identical twins. Mama bought us the same clothes when we were children, and made sure we were in the same class throughout primary school. We went everywhere together. We got on very well together and so we didn’t mind. We loved the same type of food, and wore the same clothes most of the time. We shared one of the rooms in our house, but where we spent most of our time was in a field not too far from our back door playing games together. In the rainy season, the grass in the field was so tall, you could play hide and seek there. But it wasn’t difficult to find each other so we rarely played on our own.

Read the complete story on Bellanaija.com

V is for Voter Violence - Nigeria

And a community response to it.

So the presidential elections led to some violence, especially in the northern part of the country. Sectarian violence has always been a part of the history of Nigerian, right from Amalgamation, and then independence in 1960. Always, there would arise a reason for the (usually) Muslim northerners to attack the Christian southerners among them and unleash mayhem and death. The worst in recent history was in 1967, and led the civil war in which Biafra tried to secede from Nigeria. The war ended and the NYSC started as one of the strategies to broker complete peace.

Unfortunately this same scheme, and worst of all, the young people that are it's lifeblood, was the target of rioters and murderers who took to the streets to protest the outcome of the presidential elections. These malcontents were offended that their Muslim candidate did not win, and blamed the youth corpers who had been in charge of the polls. Within hours, and lasting for days, youth corpers were pursued along the roads and butchered, locked up in their lodges and set ablaze, and had other atrocious acts perpetrated on them. No official number has been released so far of the number of people who died in the outrage, and no definitive action has been taken by the government so far.

And so Nigeriavillagesquare.com is sponsoring a petition for;

- All youth corpers serving in these volatile states be withdrawn immediately.
- All youth corpers serving in these volatile states be redeployed to other states of their choosing, or be excused for the rest of the service year.
- All youth corpers be excused from serving as electoral officers in the upcoming governorship elections as we are not convinced that adequate and confirmed security can be provided for them.
- The identities of all youth corpers who lost their lives in this violence be made public.

You can click here to sign the petition.

U is for Unhealthy Relationships

So, one of the stories going through my head has to do with someone who has experienced and abusive relationship, and is wary of investing in any other person. As I've tried to write a profile for her, I had to do some little research on this issue.

Unhealthy relationships are those ones that mentally stress you out, and they can also sabotage your physical and emotional well-being. And I'm not just talking about romantic relationships, it could also be with parents, siblings, friends, co-workers or bosses, etc. it may be easy to define, but how exactly can one know that they're in an unhealthy relationship? The following are some specifics;

- You feel afraid, and your heart races when the person is around.
- You think that you and your opinions do not matter in the relationship.
- You emotions do not count, and are actually disrespected
- You are always worried about the future or nature of the relationship
- You both have very different ideas and values and you're always the one to compromise
- The other person's anger overshadows you, and you change your actions, or lie to escape their wrath
- You feel you deserve the criticism you receive from them.

If you feel like this in your current relationship, it may be time to assess why you remain in that position. Whether at work or at home, you deserve peace of mind, and a optimal health. You may confide in a trusted friend, family member, pastor, or consult a therapist for counseling.

Usually, the first way forward is to improve on  communication between you and the person aggravating you. Be honest with them about how you feel, and how you expect to be treated. Here, you can try listing the behaviors that hurt you, and a better way the person could have phrased it that you would prefer.

If the person is apologetic and willing to work with you, you can then decide on ways forward. Try to schedule times just to talk. Also make time for both of you to simply have fun. If you're using a professional counselor, it may be time to meet them together, and try to work out if there are underlying issues that need to be solved.

If none of the above works, it may be time to end the relationship. Leave that boyfriend, husband, partner, resign from that job, or just begin to put some distance between you and the person if you cannot leave them entirely, like a co-worker in a job you may not afford to quit.

This is a serious post because I believe this is a sensitive issue.

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image source - nyblogs.net

Happy Easter Everyone!

This is my day off for good behavior remember, and I want use it to wish all of you my wonderful friends and blog readers a special Happy Easter! I wish everyone a day filled with enjoyment, friends and family.

I want to also use this opportunity to say thank you to everyone who has kept following and commenting on my blog this April. I know my posts have been more frequent than usual, with the A - Z challenge (thank God that is coming to an end soon, lol) and my book promotion. I'll be coming back in May with the regular posts you enjoy, and some new ones, so keep following.

In the meantime, Happy Easter!!

T is for Trailer - Somewhere in Africa

I saw this trailer on Youtube and I just had to share it. The movie is not out yet but if I may say so from the trailer, this may be one of the best and soul-stirring movies coming out of Nolly/Ghanawood. I want to assume that if the producers could get a trailer like this from the movie, it is an award winner.



Nollywood is not known for socially conscious or political features so one like we have in this trailer needs as much promotion as possible. No, I do not know the producers, and they have not paid me. I first saw the trailer on Celebregion.com - one of my favorite sites - and was very moved. Below are some transcriptions...

Text intro - "Much of these, facts; some of these, fiction. The last two decades however, are unarguably the most turbulent of times for most African nations. Blood like a pond filled our streets, terror like the rising sun greeted our eyes. Somewhere and everywhere in Africa, a dirge was being sung."

Though the movie is set in a fictional country, I couldn't help but think of the ongoing conflict in places like Sudan, Liberia, Sierra Leone, Somalia, Ivory Coast, Egypt, Tunisia, and in the wake of the current elections, in Nigeria. So much pain, tears, blood, and much too death! To be honest I shed tears as I watched the trailer, and I had to offer up some prayers.

In conclusion, the movie calls to mind another movie, Sarafina, and like that one, it bears a motivational message, a hope for tomorrow. I pray that hope materializes.

S is for Stanley Adetiba

He is the 'other guy', the one who almost made the love between Kevwe and Efe a love triangle. But he's so cute! Check him out below.

Actor- Joseph Benjamin

- How would you describe yourself? 
Smooth, handsome - so women tell me, successful at what I do.

- How does it feel to be back in Nigeria after a while away?
Well, it's not been long since I returned - just a couple of months - so I'm still settling down, getting to know what's happening, and getting a feel of things. I left Nigeria just over ten years ago, and things were very different then, so there's quite a bit to adjust to.

- We hear that you're quite a sharp dresser. Any recommendations on style?
Well, you can never go wrong with designer brands. My favourite are Hugo Boss and TM Lewin shirts for that formal look. Then when you want to go casual, Ralph Lauren or Tommy Hilfiger are the go-to guys.

- What do you think about the idea of second chances in love? 
They say that sometimes, the ex is an ex for a reason; other times, it could just be a misunderstanding, and you should hear the person out and give them another try. But when two people are really meant for each other, they find themselves getting second or even third chances - things just keep pushing them together.


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When my sister first read a draft of A Love Rekindled, she mentioned that usually most "other guys" were mean and that Stanley was different that way. Honestly, it wasn't me. When I brought in the character, he was supposed to be bad, and actually put more obstacles in the way of love. But as I wrote, the character took over. For the writers, has that ever happened to you?

R is for Rom Isichei

Rom Isichei is an amazing Nigerian painter, and someone I know personally.

His works blow me away, though I'm still saving up for the day I'll be able to afford the ones I really like. I recently found out that he was having his third Solo exhibition titled Quiet Spaces in Lagos;

Date and - Saturday, May 14, 2011
Time - 4:00pm
Venue - Nike Art Gallery, 3rd roundabout, Lekki, Lagos

Rom was kind enough to let me have some behind the scene pictures for my blog. Enjoy...

Q is for Queen Ovie

No she isn't a real queen, but that was what she would be if she had anything to do with it. Ovie is another of the old friends that support Efe in A Love Rekindled. Hear her;

Movie Director/Producer/Actor - Emem Isong

- How would you describe yourself?
I am street-smart, I tell it like it is, and I am unapologetically ambitious.

- How do you manage to live such an active life?
 That's part of my street smarts. I was brought up in the inland towns of Benin city, and dem no dey teach dat ting o. As someone who hopes to be very successful, I have to know how to work hard and play hard - I'm hoping to become a branch manager in my bank.

- Some people have said that you are too brash and talkative. What do you say to this? 
Well, na dem sabi. That's me, and who no like am dem fit go hug transformer!

- How do you tell whether a club is a good place to hang out? 
Oh man, it depends on the music. If they are laying down solid dance tracks, that's where the party is going to happen. Then I look at the atmosphere - is the place bubbling, with people having fun? Then of course, they have to have a good variety of drinks - me, I like Bailey's Irish Cream.

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Verdict? Do you have friends like Ovie, who even when they seem flighty, always got your back?

P is for Public Display of Affection

PDA - What do you feel about them?