Dear Myne, He Lost Interest in me since getting on Facebook

Hi Myne, we've been married for going on two years now and most things have been ok. i mean we quarell sometimes like a normal couple but we have a way to soon get back again. but recently, my husband joined facebook and things have not been the same anymore. it's like he spends all his free time on there and completely neglects me.

i blame myself now because i was the one already on facebook and i asked him to join soon after we got married. back then, he rarely updates his page, but now, he's online all the time. he's also on nairaland but am more worried about facebook because it's like he's chatting to someone there.

for more than three months now, he has showed no interest in having sex with me, and i had to initiate the two times we made love since then. we don't talk like we used to talk before all this. when i try to talk to him or engage him in a conversation, he only makes some noises. if he doesn't say hmm, he replies ok or true, true. all the time he's saying this, he is typing on facebook or nairaland. am sure he's not really listening to me.

for the last two weeks, he now sleeps in our living room, and when i wake up early as four in the morning, he's still awake chatting. the straw that broke the camels back and made me lash out to him and we had a major fight yesterday is that i discovered that he has blocked me from his facebook page.

Looking For Funke Akindele's Wedding Pictures?

Funke Akindele of Jenifa fame is one of the most notable comedic actresses in Nigeria. She has also shown off her acting chops in critically acclaimed movies like Maama with seasoned director, Tunde Kelani. Funke Akindele got married over the weekend and pictures are beginning to surface on several media sites.

Toast to happiness for Funke Akindele and husband

It seems a lot of her fans are searching for the pictures and probably due to the post I had made about Funke's role in her new movie, Married but Living Single, some of the searches are landing on this blog. So for those searching, enjoy :)

Kelly Clarkson - Stronger (What Doesn't Kill You)

This week has been a time of ups and downs for me, so this is a bit personal. But I'm sure so many out there can identify with this as well. Those who have had their heart broken in one way or another, by a significant other, a job they didn't get, losing someone they love, etc. What doesn't kill us will make us stronger for sure.

Hope you guys are having a good weekend?

Will You Choose Your Pets Over Your Spouse?

I know the issue of pets is a very delicate one. A lot of people consider their pets as their babies and we know a lot of women, if not all, will definitely choose their children over their husbands. I personally do not own any pets but neither do I see myself getting so worked up if Atala decides we should get some. Having said that, I'm assuming he would consult me before bringing the pets into the house, and only want one or two dogs or cats or some of the more common pets, like fish, birds, or mice.

Not all spouses may be so agreeable or reasonable. About a couple of weeks ago, I read about a girl who loved snakes and the blogger wanted to know if anyone would marry her and sleep in the same bed with her snakes. Of course most comments were negative. But that is before the fact, I mean, before you invest your emotions in a long term relationship. What if you're already married, and then your spouse develops a very strong love for animals to the extent of bringing hundred of them into your house?

"A man from southern Israel divorced his wife this week because she had brought 550 cats into their home. The husband, apparently not a cat lover, told the Rabbinical Court in Beersheba that he was unable to sleep in his bedroom because the surface of the marital bed was constantly covered with cats who refused to lie on the floor.

For Duets, John Legend and Robin Thicke Bring it!

John Legend is one of my favorite musicians, most his songs are just fabulous. For instance, We're Ordinary People, is just so full of Melody. I also love guys who play an instrument and the guy is not bad to look at either. He amazed me at the Sade Concert last year where he was the opening act, and when I heard he was on the new ABC show, Duets, I just had to tune in.

It was a good call, and by the end of the show, I was glad I did and know I'll be watching more episodes. While I wanted to root for John Legend's first partner, Johnny Gray, who happened to be from Seattle, it was his second duet with Bridget Carrington, that blew me away. They sang "Tonight (Best You Ever Had)" and you could almost touch their chemistry.

That is indeed what Duets are all about. There was the call and response, their voices matched each other note and pitch and they worked that stage! The difference was definitely clear between the first and second performance, and I'm hoping Bridget stays for a while.

Another stand out performance for me was Robin Thicke and his first partner, Olivia Chisholm. They dueted on his sexy song, ‘Lost Without You,’ looking into each other's eyes, and scooting up close and personal. Wow, it was getting hot even in my living room, and I was like, "get a room already", and then I wondered, maybe I should drag someone into mine. Believe me, it was that hot, LOL...

Splash into Summer Giveaway - International

The Splash Into Summer Giveaway Hop is from May 25th to 31st and whoever thought of, and timed this giveaway either knows the weather very well or has some control over it. Can you believe it's been raining almost non-stop for the past five days? Oh well, on this blog, the way I want to splash into summer is to pass that 1300 followers mark. I am also celebrating my books A Heart to Mend and A Love Rekindled, both sitting pretty at the top-ten books on the Worldreader book app. Thanks for all the support.

The winner will receive a $10 cash prize! The lucky follower should be able to collect their cash prize via Amazon Gift Card or Paypal funds transfer. Books (including shipping) of same value can also be shipped via Amazon or Book Depository. There are 4 entries in all, and it is mandatory you leave a comment on this post in answer to the question, What's your favorite summer activity. Entries close May 31, and I'll announce the winner within 48hrs and also send them an email.

To enter, fill out the Rafflecopter Form below.

Who is Looking After Your Children?

"Statistics show that the effects of sexual abuse can prove to be traumatic to a child and lead to serious mental problems during adolescence and adulthood. It’s important to mention that most kids who were abused grow up to become abusers and dysfunctional themselves in some way, shape, or form. Please protect our children. They are our future."

Above quote is the second blogger I subscribe to who has mentioned a child abuse video circulating, (who even made that video?) and while I do not want to think about it, I know child sexual abuse by minders of whatever age is real. Blogger Neetah is a doctor, and has worked with dysfunctional families who have experienced child abuse, sexual or emotional, and has the following pointers to help adults to be more vigilant and supportive of the children in their care. You can read the full post on her blog;

1)      Handsome, rich men molest children. Beautiful, talented women molest children. Ordinary people you laugh with every day molest children. Family members molest children. Church members molest children. Parents or siblings molest children. Hired helps and neighbors molest children.  Married people molest children. You simply cannot tell a child sexual predator by looking. (But do pay attention to your instincts, which see deeper than a person’s surface appearance). Most child molesters are known and liked by others and they cultivate certain relationships in order to gain access to children. Whether or not a person twangs your intuition, observe the person closely and don’t let him/her have your child alone until you’re satisfied they are completely safe. Talk to others about them. Find out all you can.

2)      A child molester may hug and cuddle your child in healthy ways right in front of you and your child doesn’t resist or fuss. This doesn’t mean nothing’s happening. Molesters themselves say that they deliberately do this so that your child, the victim, thinks you approve of the way the molester touches them. A child assumes his parents know what’s going on, so when the molester hugs him in front of you and you’re fine with that, the child thinks you’re OK with what happens in private too.

Touch of Spice by Nicole Bassey

Who says Nigerians don't read or cannot write about sex? With my two romance novels dominating the most-read books chart on the Worldreader Book App, they wanted more. Therefore, Naijastories.com is co-ordinating a writing contest for Worldreader to acquire steamy love stories written for an African audience. The story below is one of the 35 submissions received and you can enjoy more of the Touch of Spice series and Vote your favorite on the NS Polls Page.

Touch of Spice by Nicole Bassey - Rating - 18+

Keseima added a touch of spice to the pot of goat meat pepper-soup. She tasted it and smiled to herself, her mother-in-law would love it. She brought it off the fire and put a small pot of rice on, the smoke brought tears to her eyes but she bore it bravely. It could have been worse as her late husband Udeme used to say…. Udeme, the name brought bittersweet memories to mind. She remembered their first kiss, their coded jokes and their second honeymoon. He was so strong, so kind, and so thoughtful. She had thought it would last forever until that fateful Saturday three years ago. He was driving down from Port-Harcourt to see her at Uyo where she was doing a post graduate program in nursing. A group of nomadic cattlemen lost control of their herd, they ran across the road and a petrol tanker rammed into them. Udeme was two cars behind but all that remained of him was charred broken bones.

They tried to hide the news from her but it was only a matter of time. She wept uncontrollably for months and sometimes felt she was losing her mind. Three years later she still missed him but she knew he was gone for good. Her mother-in-law said it was time she considered settling down again as she was not getting younger. She knew that but it was not that easy.

At thirty-two she looked several years younger. She was 5foot 8inches tall with a full 40D sized bust, a narrow 26 inch waist and a generous backside. Her beniseed brown skin was smooth and shiny. Her face was oval shaped framing large luminous eyes that made grown men turn babies. She was a beautiful woman. Her friends made jokes about her being made on a Friday night; hence the extra care and exceptional good looks.

Debate Tuesday - Are Women Really Woe To Men?

I don't know that the Debate Tuedsay will become regular again but it's been a while we had one of them, so this is a throwback. Ladies, now don't be distracted by Will Smith as you read the text beside him. Yes, I saw I am Legend, and yes, it is true what the synopsis on the poster below says, but come on!

Some men will blame women for all and everything, including the fact that they cannot spell their names. It must be a woman's fault somehow. What say ye? Male perspectives will be much appreciated.

Seattle Rain Spoils My View of a Solar Eclipse

Last weekend was another reason to rail against the poor weather in this side of the country. While most of the other places on the West Coast were enjoying views of the solar eclipse that happened on Sunday, the rain and clouds over Seattle ruled that out for us. I've been looking forward to the eclipse for a while now, and was very hopeful since we had excellent weather most of last week.

AP Photo/Houston Chronicle, Johnny Hanson

That bright run ended on Saturday and the whole of Sunday was all bleh. And to think we actually drove several miles to see if we could catch it in another part of the county. It got dark for a while but the clouds were just too thick. Well, thank God for pictures and video. Did anyone else manage to catch this?