Tuesday, August 7, 2012
Will You Marry A Man You Know Is Cheating?
When Evelyn Lozada was asked sometime ago about her fiance Ochocinco cheating on her, she said "I care. I’m not going to say that I don’t care, but I’m not going to stress myself to a point that I’m trying to do everything to stop him. Listen, if you want to go and f-ck then whatever, like I’m 36. I’m not trying to stress about that sh-t. It is what it is and I truly feel like a man is going to do what he wants to do no matter what you do." They are now married.
Will you marry a cheating boyfriend?
No fronting o, I know some ladies who have done and continue to. Feel free to go anonymous and state why you married or would marry such a man.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Wow nobody is taalking here*
ReplyDeleteI won't marry a man I well know he is cheating oh. The bible says ' a faaithful man who can find?'
Only if the cheating started after the marriage
I'm talking oh!!
DeleteMy main issue with people who marry men who are cheating before marriage is that they think it's only sex, and all that matters is that he chose to MARRY me, so whats the big deal?
Well, if it ever crossed their minds that one of the flings could turn into something more, like one or two children outside the marriage, STD's and eloping with a younger woman, then I'm sure they will assess the risk of marrying a cheating man a bit differently.
I personally wouldn't and I have little sympathy and tolerance for girls who would. I think he has played his hand and shown you a template for what your life with him will be like. (9 out of 10 men are not genuinely sorry they cheated, they are sorry they got caught. (no empirical evidence to back this stat up btw)And you rolling over and saying that Evelyn crap just gives him carte blanche to really go for it next time and perfect his 'being shady' skills. It is not even fine after marriage, but at that point, you are in it and you will have to deal with it. I think an Evelyn-esque statement is one that enables men to do women greasy.
ReplyDeleteNO I would not...a leopard never changes it's spots....a cheating boyfriend is a cheating fiancee and eventually a cheating husband....i once forgave a cheating boyfriend only for him to do it again and that's when i stepped only regret is i didn't keep it moving the first time i found out (i wanted to but he begged and i felt pity on him....maturity is good oh i was young then) because talking to friends who knew him from his past after the breakup they said he did the same with his exes that's why they all left one ex actually contacted me for a totally different reason and the topic turned to him and she just said two words about him he is a liar and a cheat...obviously he had given me a totally different reason for those breakups. He even used to brag that he was an African man and could be with as many women as he wished too....so i would not marry a cheating man the fact that he did it in the first place and continued doing it when we were exclusive told me that he had no respect for me and the relationship...
ReplyDeleteits a dicey question. It depends seriously cos i think i knew my boyfriend was cheating when we were dating but we were in diff states and its not as if i caught him. Even when one of the girls had the effontery to talk to me, i kept my cool. One thing i knew was i loved him and i had to love myself first. Today we are married and through prayers and all, i can tell you confidently he is faithful to me 101% and the best husband i can ever ask God for.
ReplyDeleteit doesnt always work that way it depends mostly on how we women handle it. What may work for me may not work for you
how do you know he is 101% faithful to you now when you think he was cheating when you were dating? i think that you may be in denial and that is something you are telling yourself to avoid reality
DeleteMy dear, i am not in denial at all. The story is a loooong one and like i said with prayers there's nothing God cannot do. I still repeat it, i trust my husband. i can tell you this is where he is at a particular time and he will be there. It has been tested on so many occassions and proven by people who didnt believe it was possible. God remains the unchangeable changer
Deletehmmm!
Delete@ Anonymous. That right there is maturity I admire. Your union has a lot of life in it.
DeleteIt's either Evelyn desperately wanted to be married or they are both doing it for the cameras and their upcomng reality show period the man didn't even propose properly to her dude brought a jeweller home asked her to chose a ring and that was it (in her own words) they spend more time apart than together (i follow both on twitter that's how i know) she is always on the move while he is home how do you get back to work three four days after you get married esp if you are well off like they both are...i like Chad but four kids with i don't know how many women and he cheats and is not even remorseful????? mmmmmmmmmmmh as for me you i would not marry a man i know is a cheat and a serial one at that i am happier being alone. I think society also contributes to women marrying cheats at least in Africa, in the west ain't nothing wrong with being unmarried and in your thirties but Africa is a whole different story so some just settle very well knowing he was probably with someone else the night before y'all wedding just to have the coveted Mrs.title:( oh and i wouldn't marry a stingy man either lol
ReplyDeleteMarry a man who is cheating on me? I'll pass... I cannot.
ReplyDeleteHe is bold enough to cheat on me before marriage, without even trying to hide it from me, my friends and family... that means there is no telling what he will do when we marry.
I beg ooo...I'm too fragile for such nansense...
That is like digging your own grave. I will not dig my grave now. I love life well well!
ReplyDeleteMost decision making concerning love are made based on several factors including emotions. Until you have found yourself in that position don't brag. Would you say Hilary Clinton was soo stupid to have stayed with Bill?
ReplyDeleteHilary didn't stay for love. Hilary stayed for power. She had a plan and she wasn't going to let a blow job derail her on her quest for power. Bill was a means to an end. Looking at the two of them, I don't see much of a marriage in the real sense going on. Hilary is definitely not a valid example in this instance. The women we are talking about sacrifice logic at the altar of 'so-called' love and end up burnt and without a back up plan. Hilary was and always will be a calculating and logical woman
DeleteI agree re: Hilary has a strategy but she cant be used as an example in this case unless we knew her hubby was a cheater before marriage. In this article, the qs is will you go ahead and marry a man when you clearly know he is a cheater or a cheat?
DeleteMarrying him without a knowledge he cheats, and finding out he cheated on u, is a different case. Besides, I bet bill paid for it dearly. Kia the public humiliation imagine..... his children children will come to know at some point. lol.
My aunt is getting married in two weeks..she has been with the man for 20 years...and he has had up to 4 children with different women within that period..but she stayed and she still want to get married to him...
ReplyDeleteBack to you question: my sisters tell me that as long as the man respects you,it doesn't matter..but in my opinion cheating and respect do not belong together (sorry for my poor english as i am not nigerian)
Your english is pretty good.
DeleteI wish your aunt all the best but hmmm!
DeleteIf he doesn't believe I'm worth more to him than the other girls/women *whores* he's going after, then no. Shows lack of respect, honesty and Christ who is the most important ingredient needed in a marriage. Shows dude doesn't think highly of me and doesn't value what we have. Dude should be able to say NO! I love my woman.
ReplyDeleteI can cheat too with all the eye candy out there, but choose not to because of the respect, love and sanctity of the relationship.
If I forgive him and marry him, then I am inadvertedly telling him that it's okay and as long as he acts sorry, I'll always take him back. I am also laying the foundations and teaching my children that since it was okay for mummy to marry a cheat, I can do the same. God forbid.
Hear hear!
DeleteI once dated a man who slept with my friend and I still stayed with him although we have broken up. Now, I would not.
ReplyDeleteSome friend that was or is
DeleteNo! But simply because I think it's a sign of disrespect and the disrespect, when permitted to take root in unfaithfulness, will sprout and affect other aspects of your marriage more severely.
ReplyDeleteadultery is an acceptable reason for divorce in the bible, so why marry a man and head straight to divorce.
ReplyDeletewhen am dating a man and he cheats on me,I automatically stop taking him seriously.if I was flirting with the thought of someday settling down with him,all that just disappears.am a very faithful and fragile person, I believe the God who made me this way,made a man tailor made for my kind of person.I cant be with just anyone.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
ReplyDeletemyne for what na?
ReplyDeleteIf i find out a day before the wedding, its over, I will do a no show. If its during the marraige and we have kids then the marriage has turned into commercial arrangement for rent and school fees.
That the highest form of disrespect a man can subject a woman to. Ehnnn, God forbid bad thing! Me sef I join forbid bad thing too.
lol. commercial arrangement
DeleteI am not ready to settle, I am not saying I won't take a man back cos he cheated on me .. nah! but he will prove he deserves another chance. I want a man who adores and respects me soo much that cheating on me won't give him any type of peace... please for me sha, there's NO LOVE in sharing my man!! lol ..
ReplyDeleteWow. I have not been here in a while. I am seriously digging the new look MYNE!!!!!
ReplyDeleteThank you :)
DeleteAdults generally know when and why their partner is cheating. What they choose to do is a different thing. Evelyn is the only one that knows what Evelyn is doing. All we can do is not care or stand on the sidelines and cheer or boo.
ReplyDeleteWell, to be very honest I certainly could marry a man who has cheated. I am very patient, tolerant and forgiving. I also never say never because I do not know what life has in store. I could date a man for 5 years and he stays faithful but cheats after we get married, will I leave him for that reason? Very unlikely.
ReplyDeletewould you marry a WOMAN you know is cheating......?
ReplyDeleteTHANK YOU!!!!
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteNot acceptable to me its very disrespectful,it`s simply means their is higher chances of him cheating after marriage,cheating husband to be is enough reason to discontinue the holy matrimony because i see nothing but lack of trust, love,& respect which are mearnt to be the foundation of marriage.
ReplyDeleteIt`s not okay by me simple.
Nothing else to add to this. Who wants HBP?
DeleteA man who cheats simply doesn't respect you, why would you decide to stay/marry him?
ReplyDeleteNever, not when I know
ThePETprojects
....I’m not trying to stress about that sh-t. It is what it is and I truly feel like a man is going to do what he wants to do no matter what you do.".....
ReplyDeletewell, i feel like a man is not going to do what he doesnt want to do! because he simply choses to!we are higher animals and as such have wills! its another issue to wonder if a woman would stay with her man after marrriage when he cheats. but to get married to him knowing he is a cheat? God of mercy! thats a suicide mission waiting to happen!
when a woman condones unfaithfulness in a man before marriage (its logical he would continue after), she cannot cry wolf latter on after marriage. i pray God gives her enough strength to fight diseases, and not to cry or wilt when he gets younger by the year while she grows fades away.
if and when he cheats, he obviously doesnt respect you.
i'm sorry Ma, got so carried away by this that i didnt notice the make over. its soooooooooo captivatingly elegant. keep up the good work Ma.
ReplyDeletewe r all here to guard ourselves, been in relationship with my gal fwend cheating n i didnt quit rather asked her y she did it n pray she amends her ways.
ReplyDeleteWise decision my brother
DeleteHell NO! If he cheated once, he will cheat again! I have more respect in myself to marry a cheating man....
ReplyDeleteMy dear if that is your bases of leaving him u will always leave at one point or the other.Some circumstances need to be managed maturely.
DeleteNa una sabi joor. I know many girls who know their guys cheat and they don't bother. And you know why? Because they're worse than whores themselves.
ReplyDeleteFor me, I'll kill you first. Then I'll disappear.
Let me tell u the truth most men have an affair weather u like it or not.And the fact that they cheat dose not mean they don't love u.It's just that sometimes so many things goes wrong that one can hardly explain.If u go all out to find out if your husband or boy friend is cheating u will succeed i bet you.The fact that he has not started doesn't mean he will not.So u have to be careful when u leave ur boyfriend on cheating grounds cause i bet u u might keep leaving until ur 50yrs and u find out there is nowhere to go again
Delete