A Guide To Men's Biggest Fears On Your First Date And How To Make It Work

By Henry Kingston

No matter how cool men try to be on their first date, chances are that they’re just about as nervous as you are. Well, that is the nature of first dates after all. Here’s your guide to men and their biggest fears on date night number 1 and how you can deal with such situations.

He fears that you might not be what he’s expecting

Truth be told; we’ve all been there. But if you thought that everything from your dress to his looks to the ambiance to the food went perfect, and yet you still didn’t get the early morning call from him that you were waiting for the entire night, there’s a very big possibility that you ended up being ‘different’ from what he expected you to be when he originally asked you out for dinner.

Having doubts over one’s own judgements isn’t a comfortable feeling, and men have these doubts just about as often as us ladies. Truth is that finding a date is more or less just like finding a dress in a boutique with way too many options; only difference is that there’s a lot more in baggage other than a perfect fit. If you’re worried about being dumped after the first date because he thought you were different, try not to differ from how you advertise yourself when you first met. If you told him that you don’t drink, don’t go on gulping down half a dozen cocktails on date night.

He fears he’s not the only one you're interested in

For most men, the first date is like intense competition; they feel overwhelmingly pressured to sweep you off your feet because they secretly think that every other guy in the room could grab your attention. He’ll follow your gaze and wonder if they’re just looking around or checking out that perfectly handsome Patrick Dempsey lookalike a few tables across. Eventually, he’ll fear looking stupid! And you’ll be really lucky if you don’t end up with someone who ends up doing stuff that’s cringeworthy in a vain attempt to get your attention.

But that’s the thing about first dates; you tend to get distracted faster than you think and can’t fixate your eyes on an almost strange man sitting at your table right in front of you for too long. If that is the case, try to give him some reassurance by paying attention to his conversation and responding aptly. Let him know that you’re listening and that you want to know more about him. That way he’ll know that he’s left an impression on you.

He fears he just might touch you too soon

Not knowing how you would respond, making any sort of physical contact with girls for the first time on date night number 1 can be quite a bucketful of stress for men. Whether it’s just putting his hand on yours or playing footsie, he knows that there’s a way things are to be done, and breaking the guidelines could lead to some awfully serious consequences. Not getting the desired response from your end can be a big blow of rejection to his masculinity.

You’d obviously want to be a bit wary of the pushy kind, but if you sense that he’s feeling awkward about getting touchy, then consider that as a good sign; a sign of decency. And if you’re okay, then beat him to the punch and initiate the first contact yourself. Be the first to touch his hand or make foot-contact. You can even choose to drop in hints by rubbing your own fingers along your skin. It’s times like these when wearing statement jewels on a date night come is handy. Just try not to come across as too desperate.

He fears you won’t give him a second date

Most guys approach dating like a task assigned to them at work, a job they must complete, and that is to impress you. And if he’s genuinely serious about it, then five minutes on the table and he’ll already be wondering whether both of you will be out on date number 2 next weekend. Throughout the date he’ll be looking out for signs of your interest in him and his success at his job. And obviously, if he fails to see those, he’ll stress out and his ego will be hit hard yet again.

Just as I said above; dating is like shopping; if you’re not getting butterflies in your stomach and can’t sit any longer, there’s not much that you can do to make him feel better, and frankly, that isn’t even your responsibility. However, if your vagina does skip a contraction or two, don’t hesitate to drop in a few hints; you two could be onto something exceptionally great!

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Henry Kingston is an enthusiastic fashion and lifestyle blogger. Henry loves to write and make people aware of the latest fashion trends through his writings. His aim to become country's most renowned fashionista and own a fashion house where he could show all his creativity. For more updates follow him on Twitter.