Couple Love at the Encomium Black and White Ball

Chinedu and Nneoma Ikedieze

I have to stop calling these posts Couple Love since it is no more just about couples in the romantic sense of it, the next one will be tagged Date Night to showcase people making a date of events, for a day or night out.

FBI releases pictures of suspects in Boston bombing

This afternoon, the FBI has released surveillance video and photos of two young men fingered as persons of interest or suspects in the twin explosions that killed 3 and injured 170 in Boston. To contact the FBI with information, call 1-800-callfbi or online at bostonmarathontips.fbi.gov.

Bringing Google+ Comments to Blogger

+Blogger as we know it is changing by the day, and that is because Google, their Oga at the top, is becoming more and more interested in going social. To boost Google Adsense in 2009, they integrated it with blogger, and some insist that sounded the death knell for blogging. I'm not sure it's a bad thing, it's very useful for me, just like this new development may be.The want G+ comments, which will work a bit like Facebook comments, to replace Blogger comments.

After experimenting with Google Wave and Google Buzz, Google+ is now the de facto social site for all things Google, and it's not surprising they want to integrate it with Blogger, another of their strong social platforms. First it was the G+ sharing buttons, then the G+ circles (which killed Friend Connect BTW), and the G+ authorship that boosts your blog's search rankings.

According to the email I received,

Once you enable Google+ Comments, people can share the comments they make on your blog to their circles in Google+, helping you reach people that they know. And there's more: mentions of your posts on Google+ automatically show up right in your blog's comments, so you can see more of people’s public conversations about your content (and private conversations you’re part of).

Designed to be Under a Man

I am honestly still mulling over the comments by Monalisa Chinda to Sunday Entertainment Express over the weekend. I was discussing it with some friends and a few of them mentioned she was just being honest to herself and her beliefs, and I applaud her for that. When asked if she would like to re-marry one day, the actress replied,

"I would love to. I am designed to be under a man. I am not going to lie that I like the single mother thing going on. I believe in marriage. Whether you like it or not, it is the best option but it's not a do or die thing though. I have been there before and if I'm going to do it again, it has to be right by the Grace of God. I am not ready to make another mistake."

So this is not about Monalisa, I'll just like us to consider the words, "designed to be under a man" and how that relates to relationships. Considering it from three levels,

1. designed to be under a man - men generally
2. designed to be under any man - any man you end up in any kind of relationship with
3. designed to be under a specific man - a man who loves you in a mutually respectful relationship.

Taking You From Friend to Fiancee

Guess how popular this book will be? I saw this cover, and the blurb below, and could only laugh. Why I am laughing? That subtitle is just classic, "Get him to want you as much as you want him without letting him know that you want him to want you", especially the second part that I underlined. The back blurb goes into more detail...

#ThrowbackThursday - Suits with Hats

Some years ago, I think around 02/03, suits were all the rage, and if you wore them to church, you had to find a matching hat. I think the timing was at the same time as the rise in pentecostal Christianity in Nigeria. I had a few suits myself, and this was my outfit at the knighthood investiture of my dad.

Check out Ibifiri in her own suit - here :)

Couple Love at the Wizard of the Law

I announced Live Theatre on Sunday's production of Zulu Sofola's Wizard of the Law, here, and it is nice to know that it got quite a great attendance. I think I also recognize one of the faces, he knows who he is, and now I'm wondering ho his date is :)

Enjoy the pictures and if you live in Lagos, try not to miss the next one.

Solomon Akiyesi et al - Lessons to Learn

Solomon Akiyesi and his many wives. From L - R Ezinne, Lillian and Uloma

After reading yesterday that Solomon Akiyesi had a previous marriage, bringing the number of his church weddings to three, I gave up. I also thought that was the end, but the saga continues as the women have begun to trade "pity me" stories to bloggers. I do pity all three women, in the sense that they are victims of a scam artist, a philandering man who does not even have the common sense to know where to draw the line.

However, I wonder if anyone is seeing this drama as a teachable moment? It could even be worthy of a Law masters or PHD thesis. The question is how seriously do Nigerians take their marriages as a legal contract? Beyond the spiritual vows, and cheating/infidelity, do men and women understand that their marriage certificate is also a binding document that represents an oath to the state? Does the confusion stem from the fact that most of our marriages are two-tiered, the customary usually coming before the registry (church or court). Does repaying a woman's bride price nullify the legally registered marriage?

Let's use the Solomon-Ezinne-Lillian Akiyesi story as a case study.

Lilian met Solomon as a little and naïve girl in 2001. There was no one married to Solomon as at then. Down the line, Solomon got married to Ezinne who said she was pregnant as at then. Lilian moved on with her life. Years later, Solomon and his family came to ask for Lilian's hand in marriage claiming that their son was deceived into marriage as Ezinne was never pregnant and was infact confirmed in the hospital to have damaged her womb a long time ago. On investigation, Solomon's family said all rites have been retrieved and dissolved of the marriage which was based on deceit.

Dear Myne - Should I Tell My Friend About Her Cheating Husband?

This is something that has been bothering me for a while. It's sending me crazy and a I need advice quickly before I make the wrong move. This problem is not particularly about me but about my friends, Jane and Paul (Not real names).

Jane has been married to Paul for 10 years without a child.  Before she got married, she dated him for over 3 years and I still remember how excited she was when he finally proposed. She couldn't stop looking at the ring and telling me how lucky she felt. She started planning the wedding immediately and it was a very successful wedding. For the 1st 3 years of their marriage, it was obvious they were very happy. Jane worked in a small financial firm while Paul worked in an IT firm.

They both decided that they weren't ready for the financial burdens of a child, so they were on birth control for the first 3 years. Within that period, Paul got a job with Schlumberger while Jane and I got jobs in the same bank. I became Paul's banking officer and I can tell you that he was bringing in some very good money. To give you an idea of what he's worth, he has over 30 million Naira in his fixed account which I currently manage.

With their lives financially settled, they decided it was time to start trying for a child and Jane went off birth controls and that was where the issues started.

5 Ways For Women to Enjoy Sex

I just read a post that reminded me of a similar post here when Dear Myne just started, of a newly wedded wife who had pains each time she tried to have sex with the husband. Check it out, [Dear Myne - It is Difficult to have Sex with my Husband! ] there are loads of very informative comments. This one is about of a young wife who is wondering if she's circumcised and if that's a reason she does not enjoy sex with her husband of 2 years.

On the issue of circumcision and pleasure during sex, I know that even circumcised ladies enjoy sex, so no one need worry about that. For those who really want to know, you can put a mirror between your legs and look at your vagina. If there is a protruding part at the top of the two side lips, you're not circumcised.

For the lady who did not enjoy sex, I had some questions,

1. Have you ever pleasured yourself? That is the first way to know what works for you. Use your fingers and touch yourself, no need to even put it inside you, just play with your outer lips, and imagine you're enjoying sex with your husband.