Thursday, May 9, 2013

Folurunsho Alakija on Marriage - Show Your Mother-in-Law Unconditional Love

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Folurunsho Alakija is known as Nigeria's richest woman and probably the richest black woman in Africa and the world. She started her career as a secretary, then after studying fashion design in England, she founded Supreme Stitches, a Nigerian fashion label. She diversified into oil prospecting with her company, Famfa Oil, which owns one of Nigeria's most prolific oil blocks. Speaking recently at her 37th wedding anniversary, she recollected the early years of her marriage and what has kept her and her husband together this long.

It is obvious they started out on a solid footing of love and affection, when her husband insisted on marrying her against his mother's wishes. But it was not an easy road. Hear her;

“My husband’s mother was Igbo, while her dad was from South West here. And because of this, my mother in-law never wanted a Yoruba woman to marry her son. She was not comfortable also with my Muslim background then. She wanted an Igbo daughter in-law, but my husband said it’s me or nothing.

It was a tough battle until God finally prevailed... Whenever she wanted something from my husband and was not getting it immediately, she would start attacking me and saying I’m the one stopping her son from doing her biddings.

MBGN Tienepre Oki and Charles Udejiofor’s Wedding

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Tienepre Oki was the Most Beautiful Girl in Nigeria beauty queen who represented the country at the Miss Universe. She is currently the publisher of Mademoiselle Magazine and wed banker Charles Udejiofor recently. BellaNaija Weddings got all the exclusive photos from their “Walking on Sunshine” themed wedding in Delta State.

According to Tien, a mutual friend introduced them and they became good friends. A few months after they met, he professed his love at a wedding they attended together, and they officially started dating. Asked about the proposal, she added, "We went for an event together and as we were leaving I stopped to chat with a friend. Charles then told me that he forgot to give me something as I turned to look at him, he brought out the ring and went on one knee. It was a perfect moment!"

I wish them a happy married life, it sure looked like a very fun wedding.

Re - Pregnant But Unhappy Chic

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I have received an update from the lady in yesterday's post, "I don't want to keep the pregnancy, my boyfriend does". She says;

I'm beginning to have a change of heart concerning my present situation. My mum is difficult and I know that getting across to her is an almost impossible hurdle. I'll try to talk to her about keep[ing] the baby this weekend.

I would let you know how it goes. God bless! Thank you soo soo much. I appreciate your response. I have nobody else to talk to. God bless you.

This was my response to her;

I would really ask you consider keeping the baby as your BF is supportive. If you love him and see a future with him, you must realize that things would never be the same if you terminate the pregnancy. He may consent and even marry you, but he won't ever forget, and may end up blaming you when the topic comes up later on.

Top 10 Audacious and Creative Wedding Place Ideas

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By Jendy Grijalva

Congratulations - you're planning your wedding! One of the most important parts about planning this day is deciding where it will be held. It's likely that you want your wedding to be more than just "special" or "unique." A great way to do so is to think bigger - how about something creative? Audacious even? And what better way to make this happen than to play with the location? Here is a list of 10 places to hold your wedding that will certainly have the "WOW" factor.

1. Destination wedding
A semi-classic but still very unique wedding option is the destination wedding. The more classic way to do it is on a beach in a tropical location. This is always a great choice, but the phrase "destination wedding" also lends itself to be anything you really want it to be. You could go anywhere in the world to say "I do" to your sweetheart - India or the Paris!

2. At the Garbage Dump
If you're really going for unique, I bet no one you know has ever gotten married at the garbage dump! A positive side of this marriage option is that no matter what, you will never be overshadowed by the location of your wedding. You could use it as a political statement, if you're not necessarily into the whole flimsiness of a princess wedding.

POLL - Your Dream Place To Get Married

3. "I do" underwater
Love the water? Why not get married in it? You can now be married in full scuba gear under just about any surface of water imaginable. Just know that your vows might be a little more difficult to decipher via bubbles!

Wednesday, May 8, 2013

To Love A Ghost - The Stage Play

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The stage play, To love a ghost will be showing this Sunday May 12 and every Sunday in May at the Terra Kulture, Tiamiyu Savage in Lagos.

To love a ghost is a gripping tale about abuse shielded and nurtured by the depth of corruption of our society stemming from poverty.

Lois, a young and naive girl has been betrayed by the very institutions that should have protected her.

According to Tolu Ogunlesi, “To Love a Ghost is a play minimalist in plot and staging, but ambitious in reach; exploring the complicated forces that conspire to keep young people vulnerable to the abusive impulses of those who should protect and nurture them. ”

Time – 3 – 6pm.

Tickets are  available at Terra Kulture - N2,500 and N5,000 only.


Dear Myne - I Don't Want to Keep the Pregnancy, My Boyfriend Does

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I'm about 4 weeks preggers for my boyfriend. We've been dating for close to a year and planning to get married by December '13/January '14. We've been planning our wedding and attending pre-marital counselling at Church though we're not formally engaged (he did not propose with a ring, that is).

The problem is, I mistakenly got pregnant. Yea, it was out of carelessness. We are one of the most careful people ( so I thought) and I'm so disappointed in myself. Right now, I feel so much regret, anger and resentment towards my boyfriend. I'm not happy to continue this for 9 months.

I immediately decided to abort the baby, but my boyfriend is unsupportive. He says his ex-girlfriend had an abortion in his university days and he promised never to do such again. I'm devastated because I'm not ready for kids right now. We both live in the US and my career is just starting. I just started a masters which is time-consuming and also interviewing with top oil & gas companies with good responses so far. No company will take a pregnant lady seriously. (Btw, I'm 26). I want to have a great career without hindrance.

Unyime Ivy King - Communication is The Livewire of A Relationship

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After featuring celebrities for the last few posts, the up close and personal Marriage Avowals from the people around the block are back.

Unyime Ivy King is a wife, mother, and writer. She likes to do everything especially her marriage and writing with passion or not at all. She currently works with Protection Plus Services Limited, a security services company in Lagos, but her passion for writing has taken her through media houses like: Vanguard Media, Daily Times, TW Magazine, and Security & Safety Magazine. She is the author of Burning Hurt, a novel about overcoming pain caused by relationships and blogs at Unyime's Musings. Enjoy her marriage avowals...

1.How did you meet your husband?
I met my husband 16 years ago in Akwa Ibom. I had just finished a training for intending volunteer workers in church and was confused about what unit to join, when this young man approached me and requested that I join his unit, which was the security/protocol unit so that I could work closely with the pastor's wife, whom I have always admired from a distance. I did not hesitate. I joined the unit and over time, we became close.

2. How long have you been married?
We have been married for over 10 years. By September 13th this year, our marriage will be 11years old.

Honey Boo Boo's Mother is a Non-Traditional Bride

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Honey Boo Boo's mother has joined our line-up of non-traditional brides. June Shannon, called "Mama June" in the program held a commitment ceremony with her partner and Honey Boo Boo's father, Mike Thompson or "Sugar Bear", a name she coined for him.

I watched their reality show when the hype was so much to know what it was about, and watched a few more episodes after that. For all their 'village' mentality, they are a loving family and Mama June while laid back, also knew what she wanted and Sugar Bear seemed like a good man. The part where he got her a statue of a deer as a gift to spice up their romance cracked me up. His excuse, they frequently get train or road kill of deer around their house, and enjoy the free meat! LOL...

Well, the two exchanged vows, though they might not be legally binding marriage vows according to reports, last Sunday in their backyard. [see POLL, where is your dream wedding location?] Mama June sported an over-the-top camouflage and orange tulle wedding gown. Same with her partner.

What do you think of their outfits?

6 Unconventional Tips That Could Save Your Marriage

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When couples have problems with their marriages, they usually go with the more usual advice they get from friends or family. Some couples go the extra mile to talk with marriage therapists, but much of the advice they receive is wrong, says author Mort Fertel. Fertel says advice that is logical and sounds good is often ineffective, and that reconciling a broken marriage is not an intuitive process.

While I agree with the sense behind some of his teachings, most sound like he just wants aggrieved parties to an unhealthy marriage to remain in that bad situation and simply get used to it. The truth is that what works for one couple may not work for the other, and it would be best for each person to find what suits them.

On that note, I'm sharing some of the tips Fertel uses to work with couples.

Go at it ALONE. Most people think, "I need my spouse to work with me to fix our marriage." But it does not take two to tango. One person's effort can change the momentum of a marriage, and very often, it's that effort that motivates the obstinate spouse to join in the process.

Surfer Who Lost an Arm to a Shark - Bethany Hamilton - is Engaged!

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So happy for her :)
Bethany Hamilton, the surfer whose arm was severed by a shark in 2003, is tying the knot.
Hamilton announced her engagement to her boyfriend of one year, Christian youth minister Adam Dirks, on her website last Wednesday.
According to a blog post Dirks wrote on Hamilton's website, the two met in 2012 through mutual friends and bonded over their strong Christian faith.
On Thursday, Hamilton wrote on her Facebook page, "One year ago today, I met an amazing man, now we will spend the rest of our lives together and I'm soo excited! I love you Adam!"
When Hamilton was 13, she was attacked by a tiger shark while surfing on Kauai's North Shore. Though her left arm was severed in the attack, she returned to surf competitions the following year. A movie based on her life, "Soul Surfer," was released in 2011.

Via HuffPo