Love and Immigration - Nigerian Woman in the UK Attempts Suicide to Avoid Deportation

Micheal and May Brown

May Brown is a Nigerian woman who is currently in a coma after attempting suicide by drug overdose pending a deportation order by the UK immigration services. May moved to the UK from Nigeria three years ago and is a student of public affairs at Weymouth College.

She met her husband Michael Brown 12 months ago and they got married last December. However, her request was denied despite that she had a valid student visa and was married to a British National. Her husband, Mr Brown said the UK Border Agency officials believed their marriage to be a ‘sham’ with no ‘emotional attachment’.” He however insists, as does his mother, that their marriage is real.

Now the report wasn't clear on when May Brown applied for asylum in the UK, whether it was before or after her marriage. But after her application was rejected, she was due to be deported in a matter of days. May Brown was so distressed at the prospect of returning to Nigeria that she took a drug overdose and is currently in intensive care.

Boston Marathon Explosion: A Moment of Silence

I was in a waiting room when the breaking news came on CNN, two explosions at the Boston Marathon. Two people were dead and about 20 injured. Every eye was glued to the TV and as each minutes passed, the number of those injured continued to rise. I went on Twitter and soon found that an 8 years old was one of those dead. Reading the clip below on the HuffPost made me even more sad.

Boston Children’s Hospital received eight patients injured at the explosion at the Boston Marathon. Patients’ conditions ranged from good to serious. There were no patient deaths among the patients brought to Boston Children’s from the scene. Our patients included:
A 9-year-old girl with leg trauma who is in the operating room.
A 42-year-old parent of a patient is being treated in the ED.
A 7-year-old boy is being treated in the ED for a minor leg injury.
A 12 year old with a femur fracture has been admitted.
A 2 year-old-boy with a head injury has been admitted to the Medical/Surgical ICU.
More on HuffPo

May the souls of those dead rest in peace, and God grant peace and healing to those injured and all their families.

Statement from the Church on Solomon Akiyesi Wedding

The church where Nollywood actor, Solomon Akiyesi attempted to marry another woman while still legally married [read initial story] is the Overcomers World Outreach, and to show they were not flouting the law, they have responded to the incident with an official statement. The writer, Chika Moses, is a journalist and the daughter ofthe General Overseer of the Overcomers Church, Bishop N.E. Moses. [see his video]

She writes well and moderately, but no need to call into question the timing of the first wife, what if she just heard about the wedding at the last minute? I do pity the second wife, but if she has been married traditionally as is usually the case, then she is legit in the customary side. As for the would-be bigamist, I saw his FB note, no wrds SMH. As they say, age is no indicator of maturity, and going to church is no determinant to knowing to do what is right.

What was meant to be a day of celebration – the wedding ceremony of one of our members Uloma Agwu to Mr. Solomon Akiyesi at the Overcomers Church World Outreach in Aguda – was sullied by an ugly incident. Immediately following the praise and worship session and before the officiating commenced, a woman who claims to be the lawful wife of the groom disrupted the ceremony. She was accompanied by people who sought only to wreck havoc in the church. They were unruly and violent.

We regret the ugly series of events that followed this brash display. At the Overcomers Church, we do our due diligence to ensure a couple set to wed is right in the eyes of the law and in the eyes of God. To the best of our knowledge, Mr. Akiyesi, was unmarried. The Overcomers Church World Outreach regrets that the woman who disrupted the wedding chose such a time to do so. There is no ideal situation here, but it would have been right that she bring the case before church officials in a manner befitting a house of worship. This was not the case.

Are You Living Within Your Means?

With a name like Petronella Wyatt, it is clear she was born into money, in Igbo her name would be Utobundu Egoyibo. But one problem we all sometimes have is thinking good times would last always. From over-priced clothes to extravagant vacations, and more, Petronella did not save for the future rainy days as she enjoyed her GBP six figure income.

When you are a middle class person who wants to rub shoulders with the wealthy elite, when inflation and recession hit, be sure you will be left under the bus. I'm not totally without sympathy for people like Petronella, but it's more of a cautionary tale. Her piece for the Daily Mail is an eye opener.

Last year, for example, I had to decide between a summer holiday and a new summer dress. I decided on the holiday, but as the cost of the flights and hotel added up, I realised I would have to raise an additional £400.
I began selling the summer clothes I had bought the previous spring. I now buy vintage, and rummage through charity shops.
Owning a Chanel suit, the price of which has risen over ten years from £1,000 to more than £5,000, is out of the question. Indeed, I can barely afford the charity shops in St John’s Wood, where I live.
Despite these savings, I no longer take a holiday in the winter and rarely eat in a fashionable restaurant, let alone visit places like the Ritz. It is a struggle to pay the rent.

Tribute to Roger Ebert by his Wife, Chaz Ebert

I have always known about Roger Ebert since I started being interested in Hollywood and it's movies, and more recently since I got the Fandango app and started checking out the critic's reviews more often, I've been drawn to his blog for the Chicago Sun times. He is witty and fun, and yet can be serious too. I like his approach to movie reviews, and if I read his review before seeing a movie, I enjoy it more, reading the reviews after equally gives me another or a deeper insight into what I've seen.

On a personal level, I've seen him a few times in interviews, twice alone, and once with his wife, and I found his survival in the face of aggressive and repeated cancer amazing, the strength of the woman who had stood by him inspiring. Roger Ebert had attributed the success of his fight against cancer to his wife of over 20 years, Chaz Ebert, and now in announcing his death, she has penned an equally touching tribute.

CHICAGO, April 4, 2013 -- Chaz Ebert issued the following statement Thursday about the passing of her husband, Roger Ebert, a day after he celebrated 46 years as a film critic:

"I am devastated by the loss of my love, Roger -- my husband, my friend, my confidante and oh-so-brilliant partner of over 20 years. He fought a courageous fight. I've lost the love of my life and the world has lost a visionary and a creative and generous spirit who touched so many people all over the world. We had a lovely, lovely life together, more beautiful and epic than a movie. It had its highs and the lows, but was always experienced with good humor, grace and a deep abiding love for each other.

That Gang Rape in 2011 actually Happened in Rivers State

A rape video went viral last year, and I think before the news about it died down, a couple of the suspects had been arrested. It was generally believed that the rape took place at the Abia State University, but the police have confirmed it did not, but in Rivers State. Vanguard reports that Abia State government is not happy.

Reacting to the revelation by the Police in Rivers State that the gang rape actually took place at Obite in Etche local government area of Rivers State, Chief of Staff to the state governor, Mr. Cosmos Ndukwe, warned that the state had had enough of the embarrassment. He said the state government would no longer take kindly  to politically-motivated bad press directed against it.

According to him, those who linked the incident to Abia State University were hasty and to say the least, made with so much bad blood. He said they already formed their opinion without any investigation, noting that they also refused to listen to Abia State Police Command which preliminary investigations showed that the incident did not happen in the state.

While he has a point, not everything has to be political bad press. The outrage should be directed at finding and prosecuting the culprits, and not on debating the venue of the crime.

Bill and Melinda Gates are Looking for a Better Condom

The Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation, that is. They have put out a call to geeks and inventors interested in sexual health and AIDS prevention to think up ideas to improve the current condom used by virtually everyone. The details have been posted on their Grand Challenges website as follows;

We are looking for a Next Generation Condom that significantly preserves or enhances pleasure, in order to improve uptake and regular use. Additional concepts that might increase uptake include attributes that increase ease-of-use for male and female condoms, for example better packaging or designs that are easier to properly apply. In addition, attributes that address and overcome cultural barriers are also desired.

Basically, the Gates Foundation is saying they see the point of those who do not like the condom for reducing their pleasure, so they are offering a $100,000 startup grant to the person who will design this "next generation condom". The start-up grant could lead to $1 million in further funding if your idea is found to have merit.

Now let me go on put on my thinking hat, sexual and public health education used to be my first love. Any other takers? LOL...

Akwa Ibom Widows Demand Welfare From Governor

Surely, a welfare package should have been written into the state budget as well? According to Vanguard;

Hundreds of widows in Akwa Ibom on Monday trooped to the Government House, Uyo, urging Gov. Godswill Akpabio to empower them financially to enable them establish small-scale businesses.

The widows, who came in buses from the 31 Local Government Areas in the state, could however, not see the governor. This was because the governor had reportedly travelled out of the state for official engagements.

Speaking to journalists, the President of the Akwa Ibom Widows Association, Mrs Sylvia Effiong, said that they decided to bring their case to the governor as they were dying in pains and hunger without anybody to assist them.

Effiong said that they had been watching through the television how the governor had been empowering other less-privileged people and they wanted to benefit from such gesture.

Ford Adverts Showing Women Bound and Gagged is Offensive

The Kardashian sisters bound and gagged  with Paris Hilton driving. 

After online outcry, Ford and its Indian advertising agency have apologized for ads showing women bound and gagged in the back of a Ford Figo and admitted that they should never have been created at all.

One of the ads for the Ford Figo subcompact car is the one above showing caricatures Paris Hilton winking while the Kardashian sisters are gagged and bound in the back of the Figo. The other ad shows a different set of three scantily clad women gagged, bound, and crammed into the back of the Figo while Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi looks back from the front seat, smiling and giving the "peace sign."

The tag line at the bottom of both ads says, "Leave Your Worries Behind." IMO, the ads do not showcase this tagline at all. Instead they are offensive to women on so many levels. And to think this is happening in India barely weeks after tourists had been either raped or been victims of attempted rape. Let's not even forget the young lady that died last year after viciously being gang raped.

Why Did Goodluck Jonathan Pardon Alamieyeisegha?

Presidential pardons are used all over the world and I totally agree with the morale behind it. If someone is wrongfully convicted, or if they are truly repentant and have done restitution in other ways for their sins, then it is only fair to pardon.

One thing about pardons in the Nigerian political space that makes me uncomfortable though, is that they have the effect of treating a conviction as though it never happened. Pardoned criminals can no longer be referred to as ex-convicts and can run for presidential office.

Some very political Presidential pardons in Nigeria include those President Shehu Shagari granted to General Yakubu Gowon for participating in the coup that killed General Murtala Mohammed and to Col. Chukuwemeka Odumegwu Ojukwu for driving the Nigerian Civil War. Gowon piped down in his politics but Ojukwu ran for president in 2003.

General Abdulsalami Abubakar in his short tenure also granted a pardon to Obasanjo for his convictions for treason and that paved the way for him to contest and become president in 1999.

The New Pope Francis - Cardinal Jorge Mario Bergoglio

The new pope has been selected after two days of the Cardinals deliberating on their election of the successor to Pope Benedict. A black man, a cardinal from Ghana, was in the running to be pope, but he did not make it. The new pope, Jose Mario Bergoglio, is a Jesuit and he is from Argentina, in South America. "The new pope, 76, who will be called Francis ... is also the first non-European leader of the church in more than 1,000 years." NYT

This will be my second time of seeing a pope elected and it remains a historic event for me. Roman Catholics have not had it easy in the past few decades but the denomination remains a pillar in Christendom. While the new Pope, Francis, is non-European like some people wanted, I wonder about his age and how strong he is to carry on the papal work.

I hope this new pope will continue to build on the modernization of the policies of the church to include those who are marginalized including on issues that affect women. Also, he has to be firm in tackling pedophilia in the church in a way thay benefits and affirms the dignity of victims while making the abusive perpetrators face justice.

50Cent Tries To Kiss Erin Andrews at Daytona500

#thatawkwardmoment when @50cent attempted to kiss @ErinAndrews as she went to interview him during the pre-race event at the on-going Daytona500. Erin Andrews must not be such a big fan of the rapper and actor because gave him the cheek. He took like a gentleman though Twitter went wild, shifting focus from Danica Patrick and the other NASCAR drivers to +50cent and +Erin Andrews.

 GIFs and videos have already been made to memorialize the event :)

My Questions on the Pope's Resignation, Answered

Since the news of Pope Benedict's resignation yesterday, some questions had been on my mind. I am not Roman Catholic, but as a child, we held loads of these long discussions on the pope and RC catechism. Like I was saying to someone, Pope John Paul II was like THE POPE then, I never heard anything like a resignation or abdication. I assumed Popes couldn't and only death could separate them and their office. Well, now I know better...not only can popes resign [Benedict is not the first], they are also not always infallible. The eye-opening Q and A below;

Will he still be infallible?

No—and in fact, he’s never been infallible. In accordance with the First Vatican Council of 1870, the pope is infallible only when he makes an ex cathedra statement—that is, a statement concerning “a doctrine concerning faith or morals to be held by the whole Church.” Most popes never make ex cathedra statements during their papacy; only one infallible statement (regarding the Assumption of Mary) has been made since the First Vatican Council of 1870. Pope John XXIII was quoted as saying, “I am only infallible if I speak infallibly but I shall never do that, so I am not infallible.” Pope Benedict XVI has never spoken ex cathedra, and he will lose the ability to do so once he resigns from the papacy.

When People Say Men Must Rape

I try not to take most things too seriously, but there are issues that get my blood boiling. One of those topics is rape. Women and children continue to be the vast majority when victims of rape are numbered, and I find it galling that our culture would rather blame them or sweep the stories under the carpet, than face the men who perpetrate this hate crime, and deal them full and swift justice.

Now, someone who reads this blog, has written an article for YNaija that seems to be in response to my earlier post, Lets talk to the men who rape, shall we?

In his article, he agrees with my point that a lot of Nigerian men struggle with thoughts of rape, or may have raped before. [This I think is due to the heavily partriarchal culture in Nigeria, where women are expected to be subservient to men, and women's bodies are seen as owned by their men or the society].

Labaran Maku Versus Transparency and Accountability

Former Nigerian Minister, Oby Ezekwesili, who was also at one time "Madame Due Process is stepping up the national conversation. Last weekend, in her remarks during the convocation lecture at the University of Nigeria, Nsukka, she accused the Nigerian government of squandering about $45 Billion in foreign reserve account and another $22Billion in the Excess Crude Account left after the last administration. Following the reports of her speech in the press, the Minister of Information, Labaran Maku, accused Mrs. Ezekwesili of misinforming the Nigerian public, insisting she has doesn't have sufficient understanding of government finances.

According to SaharaReporters, "although Maku made these sweeping statements, he did not provide any substance to his attempted rebuttal of Mrs. Ezekwesili, who was briefly the Minister of Education before her departure for the World Bank. But Minister Maku did say of Mrs. Ezekwesili that she “collected” N352.3 billion as Minister of Education, suggesting that Ministerial budgets are normally “collected” by Ministers."

3rd Mainland Bridge Crash and the US Toyota Recalls

Over the weekend, the news outlets were agog with headlines of an overspeeding Toyota Sienna which crashed through the railings of the Third Mainland Bridge and fell into the Lagos Lagoon. Luckily, there was just one occupant in the car at the time of the accident, and he was rescued by Fishermen and others working on the lagoon. The man has now recovered a bit and spoke to the press saying he had not been overspeeding like had been earlier reported.

Reading this reminded me of the Toyota recalls of the past few years in the United States, of various Toyota brand cars with faulty accelerators. A crash with a recorded 911 call by an occupant who later died along with three others brought the sudden unintended acceleration fault to the public and national consciousness in 2009. Several other crashes involving Toyotas kept surfacing the issue up till 2011 when massive recalls by Toyota were launched, and the CEO appearing at a hearing before the American Congress.

In the Nigerian crash, the driver, Olusola Oladimeji, in addition to insisting that he had not been speeding, also commented that his airbags did not deploy after the crash. I had always kept half an ear on the Toyota faults and recall news since we also have a Toyota, and so this news report today made me try to check around for any connections.

Let's Talk to the Men Who Rape - Shall We?

There is often the perception that men who rape are beasts and animals, the dregs of society. But is that really true? I think we make a mistake when we equate rapists with murderers, violent delinquents, street touts, depraved armed robbers, etc. In my experience, and that of a few women I've spoken with, or heard their stories, rapists are more usually the men around you, men you know.

It could be a male friend, coursemate, colleague, or neighbour. In some terrible instances, it could be someone related to you, a father, brother, and for some women, a boyfriend or a husband. Now, I know, I know. I am being heavily gender biased. A contributor to a thread on Facebook almost derailed a discussion on rape by bringing up the fact that women rape too, and that men can equally be victims of rape. I will not deny that.

However, history, statistics and current events, as well as shared experiences show that rape is a crime that is predominantly committed against women. So I'll focus on male rape against women here. As I was saying, rapists are not always strangers. In the sensational Abia rape case last year, the victim knew some of her rapists, and called them by name. They were not armed robbers, they were not street touts, they were university students.

20 Children Dead in Connecticut School Shooting

You think you've seen the worst that can happen, and then a day like this comes and breaks your heart all over again. Just last week in our backyard (Portland in neighboring state, Oregon), a gunman killed two people and then himself at a shopping mall. Today, the violence is targeted at children, while they were in school, and all these just a few weeks, days to Christmas. What is really going on?

NEWTOWN, Connecticut (Reuters) - A heavily armed gunman opened fire at a Connecticut elementary school on Friday, killing 26 people including 20 children in the latest in a series of shooting rampages across the United States this year, U.S. media reported.

The gunman was dead inside Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecticut, state police Lieutenant Paul Vance told a news conference.

Vance said there were 28 deaths in Connecticut - 20 children and seven adults from the school and another person connected to the suspect at a house in Newtown. The total included the shooter, who media said was a 24-year-old man. The New York Times reported that the gunman killed himself at the scene.

Prank Call Gone Wrong: DJs Respond to Nurse's Death

It was a shock to hear last week that one of the nurses who answered the phone when two Australian DJs made a prank call was dead, and had committed suicide. The DJs, pretending to be the Queen and Prince Charles called the private hospital where Kate Middleton was admitted for morning sickness to get some laughs for their readers. No one could have foreseen it would end this way.

From what I can tell from news reports, the nurse who killed herself, Jacintha Saldanha, was the receptionist who picked the call, and then actually transferred them to someone on the ward. I listened to the call myself and she did not say more than a couple of sentences. I found it difficult to make the stretch from the prank call to the apparent suicide for a wife and mother of two teenagers.

To be honest though, I don't know her, and I don't know what she may have been going through even before the prank call, maybe the prank and the backlash she expected from family, friends, her employers and the general public became too much, the final straw that broke the proverbial camel's back. As might be expected, Mel Greig and Michael Christian, the two Australian DJs behind the hoax, are totally broken up as seen in a recent interview.

Same-sex Marriage Licenses granted in Washington State

At the elections last month, Washington state where we live made history as one of three U.S. states where same-sex couples were by popular vote, granted the right to get married. The law that legalized same-sex marriage took effect by midnight today, and from the news, gay and lesbian couples eager to exchange vows have been lining up the marriage licensing offices since yesterday.

It was back in May this year that President Obama in an interview made comments supporting same-sex marriage. Some were outraged and others happy. I am all for equal rights for everyone though I admit that on the gay marriage issue, my thoughts are still evolving.