Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Strictly Soulmates - Finding The One Within Your Faith

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Strictly Soulmates is a TV series in which members of different faiths look for their perfect partner. There is a Christian, Muslim, Jewish and Hindu version of the show. I've seen the Christian and Muslim videos and I think there's something in there for a lot of us to learn from and have a conversation about within our circles. Watch when you have the time, each is about an hour long. This is the blurb for the show

Looking for love is tough at the best of times and it can be even harder when your pool of potential partners is small. Welcome to the world of being young, single and religious. This is looking for love as it's rarely been seen on TV before - with religion in play there are a whole new set of rules and it can be seriously tough to find 'the one'. Strictly Soulmates takes a fun, entertaining and emotional look at the real life trials and tribulations of a group of singletons trying to find their perfect match from four different religions: Evangelical Christian, Hindu, Muslim and Jewish.

Dear Myne - My Boyfriend of 9years Keeps Breaking up With Me

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I was hoping some of the readers here could help me with a neutral point of view. I am a 25yr old lady and have known this guy for almost 9yrs. We met in school when I was barely 17yrs and he was 22. I know a lot of you don't believe in love at first sight but there are no other words to describe how it was.

It was all about loving each other's company and we waited for 4yrs (till I was legally of age) to take the step of becoming sexually involved. Sometimes we had nothing to eat but our love kept us full. 2yrs ago I got pregnant and because we didn't have so much financially we decided to get an abortion which almost killed me. I then asked him for some form of commitment but to my surprise he broke up with me the next day.

2months after that he came back pleading but I was still so hurt I refused to take him back. However every relationship I've gone into in the past year has failed because I couldn't find that bond with any of them. During this time he continued his begging and then finally I took him back only to discover after some time he had a girlfriend.

The Competition Between Exes About Who Gets Married First

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When Tiger Woods and Lindsey Vonn officially announced their relationship on Monday, my first thought was "Is there a competition with his ex-wife going on?" A few days before then, it had made the news that Tiger Woods' Ex-Wife, Elin Nordegren was dating billionaire Chris Cline. I wondered which of the announcements preempted the other, and what it meant vis-a-vis rebound relationships after divorce. This is not the first time I've heard similar stories, and maybe some of you have too.

BTW, it also happens with couples who were just dating and then break up, there seems to be this subtle competition about who will be the first to find a new partner, with the cherry on top being who will be the first to take that walk down the aisle. Each of the people in the broken relationship seem to want to show the other person that they have moved on, and are so over them.

For instance, Kanye West. Within a year of them breaking up, Amber Rose hooked up with another guy, got engaged, and before you could say "Musa", she was pregnant. Some people have pointed to that as the reason for the fast track of Kanye's relationship with Kim Kardashian, and especially the pregnancy even before she's divorced. To crown it all, he now styles her, and she wore a similar dress to announce her pregnancy as Amber Rose did.

The Great Toilet Paper Debate - Over or Under

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How do you roll your toilet paper? Funny enough this is one of those mundane but everyday stresses that affect marriage, and even break up some relationships. There are two other bathroom ethics that compare to the toilet paper debate - the toothpaste tube and the toilet seat debates. These issues can nag away at couples who do not agree about them, and because we use the bathroom everyday, each morning or evening is an opportunity for another disagreement.

Some say the ultimate debate is whether the toilet paper should roll over or under. Lucky for Atala and I, we're both roll overs. And it seems the majority of people in America, up to 70% agree with us that the toilet paper hangs over. How do I know this, some people over at Enginnering.net found out, and it has now been made into a simple infographic. Check it out below...

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Kano Bus Station Bomb Blast: Death Toll Rises

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When I saw the news of the Kano bomb blast yesterday on some blogs, I didn't want to read it, it was beginning to look like bomb blasts were a daily affair in Nigeria. And it's just too depressing to see all the bloody pictures that come with such news. But I've not been able to escape it today as it made international news and the death toll has continued to rise, some are saying up to 50 or more.

I guess we should never become numb to these incidents, maybe that is what the terrorists want. I honestly don't know what future Nigeria as a country has with bombs raining mass death almost on a weekly basis, especially when it appears, like in this case, that there is an ethnic bias to the killings.

Supposedly the government through JTF and even with amnesty and peace talks are on it, but the results are definitely not people have been hoping for. I will sound selfish if I say that my biggest fear is that it gets down south, or that it affect my friends and family, but that is the truth. But whether in the north or south, I wish this mindless violence would stop. And it's not like the south is totally trouble free, kidnappings are on the increase, and some end in the victim's death.

May the souls of those lost in all the violence rest in peace.


Abuja Men's Club Where Cheaters Pay 100K Fine

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I lived in Abuja for several years as a single, working class lady, and I can tell you categorically [no oga at the top can say otherwise, hehehe..] that up to 7 out of 10 men that asked me out were married. There is also the other side of the coin that some single ladies in Abuja, knowing that the married men may be living separate lives from their wives, went all out to hook the men and make second homes with them in Abuja. Well, a men's club has risen to the task to help these philandering men keep to one woman. If you are reported and proved to have cheated on your wife, you pay a N100K fine to the club. The Sun Nigeria reports...

The Aso Country Club is out to re-invent stronger and more peaceful family ties among the members, therefore it has defined punishment for adulterers. But you may ask how they arrive at conviction for any accused before the one should be found guilty as to pay the fine?

They agree that adultery is a big menace to marriages, therefore, a way to take away the threat to family is by clamping down on guilty members with the N100,000 fine. It might surprise you that majority of the members of the club are middle-aged men and even men with very young families.

But they are resolute on waging a fierce war against the biggest threat to marriages, launching in a commando fashion, an operation to restore sanity and family ideals.

10 Ways to Know You're Bargaining for Love by Z.R. Moore

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For some of us, finding love isn’t as easy as walking out your front door. Some people have to work a little harder than others for it. Is that because they’re less deserving, or is it because their love radar is a little off. Whatever the reason people do strange, and futile things to get the love they desire. One such thing is bargaining with the significant other for a relationship. Here are some ways to determine if you’re bargaining for love.

What is bargaining a for love?

Bargaining for love can be considered the same thing as compromising. However, the difference between regular compromising and bargaining is this. A compromise usually results in a win-win for both parties involved in the situation. Bargaining typically is more lopsided. You give only to get very little in return. You’re simply selling yourself out, and selling yourself short just to have a relationship with someone. Here are some examples of bargaining for love.

1. You know that he/she doesn’t really want to be with you so you make yourself completely available to their every beckon call hoping that they’ll throw you a morsel of affection your way.

MI Abaga Releases New Single Chairman on G+ Hangout

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MI Abaga, one of the foremost rappers in the Nigerian music scene, accompanied the global premiere of his highly anticipated new single Chairman using Google + Hangout. The premiere was streamed live across all portals online, social networks and via Radio and TV. Joined by Agbani Darego, from New. York, Ice Prince, Waje, Freeze and Kore Brown, MI interacted with loyal fans in the comments area of his hangout. You can download the music at the link, and watch the Hangout videos below.

Download Chairman

Dear Myne - I Find it Difficult to Leave my Abusive Boyfriend

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I'm currently in an abusive relationship and the sad thing is I find it difficult to break out. He's someone I have come to love. He's my future.

We have been dating for close to 4 years now and there's no month that passes by without him abusing me. He fits into huntley's definition of a bad guy. Just recently, I caught him red handed having sex with my cousin but still, I love him. I know many of you would rain insults on me for being foolishly in love with a guy who treats me anyhow but the truth is is we've both come a long way and each time I feel like breaking up with him I just find myself not being able to.

He is the one who deflowered me and letting go of him would only cause more pain. I'm confused as to what to do. Something tells me if I break up with him I will never be able to love another guy. Please I need your advise. I'm a lady who's hurting. I feel less than a woman because of this guy.

______
PS - This came in under bad boys and those who love them. I think we can all agree she should leave, great comments will be those that present practical steps that will help her make the decision. And yeah, no raining insults either.

Polyandry - One Woman and More Than One Man

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Polygamy is often used when one man marries more than one wife, but the correct term is polygyny.  Polygamy is actually an umbrella for the two words - Polyandry and Polygyny - that involves multiple partner in marriage. Polyandry in contrast to polygyny is where a woman takes two or more husbands at the same time. Most broadly, polyandry refers to sexual relations with multiple males, within or without marriage.

And it is alive and well, and not just in India where it is the culture in some parts of the country, including where the young woman in the picture above lives with her five husbands, as shown in an article by the Sun.