How To Move Past The Rough Patches in Your Relationship

By Sylvia Harmon

Being in a relationship can be amazing and trying at times– sometimes the switch can occur across a few weeks or as little as a few sentences. But do you feel like your relationship has been more trying recently rather than amazing?


While it’s natural to move through rough patches in a relationship, it’s more important that we know how to deal with them and move beyond them. I’ve compiled a list of 9 ways you can help your relationship and don’t worry, you can even use these tips if you are blissfully happy. It never hurts to take preventative measures.

1. Work on yourself
Before focusing on what’s wrong with your relationship, take a step back and look at yourself. Are you making yourself happy? Are you happy with your health, your job, your attitude, etc.? If not, then it’s time to work on you. The best way to be in love with someone else is to love yourself first.

2. Go on creative dates
Remember when you first met and the two of you would surprise each other with fun, new things to do? What happened? Now it’s just dinner with some shopping thrown in here and there. Get back out there, get dressed up, get explorative and take on the town, country, city, whatever! Here’s some ideas to get you started.

3. Surprise each other
In the same vein as above, think back to how you both used to surprise each other with little gifts, favors, and dates? Bring ‘em back. Plan an all-expenses paid weekend getaway for your partner. Bring them breakfast in bed or pick up their favorite coffee for no reason. Surprises don’t have to cost you a lot money, just think of small ways you can do something nice for your partner.

4. Get sexy in the bedroom
Ditch the good ole fifteen minute routine you guys have nailed down and try to experiment a little. Bust out some lingerie or sex toys from Adam and Eve, surprise them in the kitchen or car or start talking dirty. Breaking from your routine, even just a little, can make you feel totally invigorated.

5. Take time apart
It’s important to take some time apart if you live together or spend a lot of time together. Go visit a friend for the weekend, stay with your parents for a few days or simply just don’t call each other for a few days. The absence keeps you both aware of what you have and to not take each other or your time for granted.

6. Share secrets
Share some deep secrets with each other if you feel like you’ve lost the connection recently. Sharing with one another can cause you to form an automatic bond and have a deeper understanding of each other. It also builds the trust between the two of you and can make you feel much closer.

7. Get sexty
Send your boo a few racy texts during the workday the next time you feel like your attraction to each other has turned down a little. This is a great way to fire things back up. Run to the bathroom and snap a sexy pic for them or tell them what you’re going to do to them when they get home. The anticipation will get to both of you and keep you on you toes.

8. Know when to forget the past
The saying forgive and forget exists for a reason. If your partner did something in the past that you forgave them for, then it’s also time to forget it. It doesn’t help when you keep bringing up old issues or incidents. In fact, you’re causing more damage doing this than the original problem did. If they have moved on then it’s time for you to as well.

9. Explore new things together
Getting a little bored? Start exploring new hobbies together. Find something you both have in common, like wanting to cook better or learning how to rock climb and then set out to do it together. Experiencing something new with each other creates a bond as well as a support system for each other. Push each other and you’ll find that you’re happier than ever and no longer bored.

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Sylvia Harmon is a sex and relationship blogger currently living in sunny Orlando, Florida.