10 Mistakes Men Make in Relationships

We all know that relationships can be tough. They begin with an awkward dating period where both persons are on their best behavior. After a few months, those curtains start to unravel and you begin to see shadows of the real person.

Men often make a number of relationship blunders during these crucial initial phases, and we're here to help you recognize the ten worst ones. If you're just getting started in a relationship, or part of a long-term affair, get pen and paper. (Or, you could just print it!). You'll want to keep track of these tips.

Giving a woman too much power.
Guys usually get into trouble when they allow a woman to have too much (if not all) of the control in a relationship. She decides when you go out; she decides when you have sex; she decides which friends you can keep; and may even decide what color slacks you should wear to a party.

Yesterday and Today's Men in Nigerian Government

There is rarely one side to any story, and when I championed Oby Ezekwesili's call for a debate with someone in the current administration, I meant it. Not because I think she is a messiah for Nigeria, but because I am all for transperancy and accountability, qualities that are barely lacking in the political climate, and basically what she was asking for.

Since then, a lot of articles in defense of Jonathan have been written, it is just unfortunate that most are from paid aides or people in his cabinet. That said, Reuben Abati came out with a view from the other side in one of his best opinion pieces since he became a media man for the president. The commentary is hard-hitting and places a mirror before some of the ministers and members of the national assembly during the previous administration. I see a lot of truth in the what he says, and I think it is worth reading.

A loosely bound group of yesterday’s men and women seems to be on the offensive against the Jonathan administration. They pick issues with virtually every effort of the administration, pretending to do so in the public interest; positing that they alone, know it all.  Arrogantly, they claim to be better and smarter than everyone else in the current government. They are ever so censorious, contrarian and supercilious.

They have no original claim to their pretensions other than they were privileged to have been in the corridors of power once upon a time in their lives. They obviously got so engrossed with their own sense of importance they began to imagine themselves indispensable to Nigeria.  It is dangerous to have such a navel-gazing, narcissistic group inflict themselves with so much ferocity on an otherwise impressionable public. We are in reality dealing with a bunch of hypocrites.

Dare Art Alade - February Man Candy #5

Dare Art Alade has been married for 6 years [together with his wife for 8 - 9 years] and they have two children. On what he thinks are the secrets to making his marriage work, he says;

There is no magic about it, it’s just about getting along. If you work together, it even makes it better which we do; sharing ideas and doing a lot of projects together. Also, respecting each other is very important. We are two different people and you can’t change anyone. You can only be supportive and encourage each other and that is what we’ve done.

In a marriage, you’ve got to be humble. Nigerian men are fond of being too braggadocios and hard. Every coin has two sides and if you realize that without the other side, you won’t even have a coin, then you know that it’s not that you’re more than the other person or the other person is more than you. You also have to praise each other; praise that person when their praise is due so the person can also praise you when your praise is due. 

See the rest of his album below;

Charlyboy and Lady D on 2nd Honeymoon Trip

CharlyBoy is one of those people you can either love or love to hate. While I'm not such a fan of his music, I admire his personality. His social consciousnessis admirable as he comes from a relatively wealthy and educated middle class home, and has equally done well for himself. I was equally impressed after he visited a bank I worked at six years ago.

Not only was he alone, and made no fuss as it took his account officer several minutes to be able to attend to him. His wife later joined him and we got to meet them, no autographs in those days, but many of us in the office then respected him. The closeness with Lady Diane was clear to see.

They are still going strong, and recently it was in the news that on his wife's birthday, Charlyboy planned a birthday surprise to celebrate his nearly 36 years of love and marriage with Lady Diane. He secretly organized a vacation that spanned four cities in four countries around the world. Enjoy some pictures from the PowerBike tour of Dubai...

How to Make Couscous and Shrimp Salad

Couscous is one of those side dishes I go for when I want a quick and easy dinner. Like rice, it goes with most soups, stews, and sauces and better than rice, it cooks in just 5 minutes. It is also lighter than rice and much healthier, unless you're using brown rice.

For those who are not familiar with couscous but may know semolina, they are one and the same. Couscous is semolina in grains rather than floury as we use in eating our soups. In the grainy couscous form, you serve with vegetables, stewed meat and lots of spices, as couscous can be a bit bland otherwise. Put on top, or mix together to make a salad, like this recipe.

Linda Ikeji - You don’t need any Aristo to give you anything

Linda Ikeji with her two cars

When I featured Linda Ikeji and her inspirational book in 2010, her blog was just on the verge of taking off. Today, she is the foremost personal and celebrity blogger based in Nigeria. I said back then that Linda "inspires me with her humility, can-do-spirit, her consistency and the open mind with which she draws in people. She doesn't mind helping where she can and sometimes offers. You know that mantra, let's all be great together? That is Linda."

When my first book, A Heart to Mend, came out in Nigeria, Linda happily and without stress or asking for payment put up the press release on her blog. Since then, I've been a close follower of her blog, and when I feel down and like I'm tired of this online work here and on naijastories, I think of Linda Ikeji, Bella Naija, and I recharge myself.

Recently, Linda added a 2011 Infiniti FX 35 SUV to the Camry she already owns. In her thank you note posted on her blog, she said some things, in addition to the title above, that has further endeared her to me. Hear her;

10 Ways to Have a Memorable Valentine's Day

Valentines Day — the day of love! But sometimes Valentine’s Day can end up being the least romantic day of the year with the majority of people buying the same thing for their loved one year in year out. The same old flowers, chocolates or even a dodgy card can put you in the dog house, resulting in the infamous Cupid’s arrow being aimed at your head not your heart!

Many people seem to celebrate the day out of obligation rather than celebration, but the best advice is to ‘think’. Put in a bit of original thought and it will be obvious that you have made some effort this time round.

So what can you do make your loved one love you in return on Valentine’s Day? The team at realbuzz have come up with some great ideas to ensure that Cupid’s aim is as true as your intentions.

Beyonce hugs Jay-Z after Super Bowl Halftime Show

In my last post on Beyonce's planned Superbowl Halftime show, I wondered if Jay Z would join her on stage. He did not but was backstage, showing support and cheering her on. And guess who gets a bear hug when she's done? The loving hubby, of course. The picture above of two of them was shared on Instagram, and I find it so inspiring :)

As for the show itself, Beyonce actually opened with Love on Top, which I thought she would stay away from, hehehe. Then she went into a medly of "Crazy in Love," "End of Time," and "Baby Boy". She was then joined by Destiny's Child's Michelle Williams and Kelly Rowland, for short clips of "Bootylicious", and "Independent Woman" and a "Single Ladies," performance. When Kelly and Michelle left the stage, Beyonce ended with Halo, another slow love song.

I thought the show was a good mix of smooth and high energy performances, and when it ended, I wanted more, LOL... Enjoy the pics..,

Men Want Partners not Homebodies by Topazo

A wife is more than a homemaker or a bedmate unlike the popular belief among ladies of nowadays. Most ladies think that what an average guy wants from them is somebody to cook his meals, do his laundry, clean his house and sleep with, so they offer these services hoping to convince their men that they are wife material. Thus they are bewildered when after all these they are still dumped. Then they become embittered.

Most feminists nowadays now tell their fellow womenfolk not to perform any ‘’wifely’’ duties for the guys that they are dating as that is the key reason why they remain unmarried. According to them, the guys see no reason to propose marriage to them because they are already enjoying all the benefits of marriage with them.

While these may be partially true, it is also misleading and reflects the ignorance of the womenfolk about what a guy really wants from them. A lady has been taught by her mother that to be a good wife, she must possess above average culinary skills to woo the man, ‘’ the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach’’ they dish out the ancient words. She must also be good homemaker. So she takes pains to learn all these and then tells herself that she is ready to be ‘Mrs. Right’ for the ‘Prince Charming’. But they couldn’t be more wrong.

Joseph Benjamin - February Man Candy #4