Parents Have To Be Careful What They Say To Their Kids

By Stupendous Grace in response to Funmi's One Woman's Experience Growing Up Dark-Skinned in Nigeria

Thanks Funmi for this; very true.

However, the truth is that the issues extend beyond just skin colour and weight. I was dark skinned, skinny and quite tall growing up ( I still am). The comments I heard from neighbours and teachers almost eroded my self esteem. They made me want to slouch every chance I got because I was ashamed to stand tall and be noticed.


However, i guess if i didnt like how tall I was, i could not do anything about it. Bleaching was to dark skin what 'hiding away' was to being lankily tall. Thanks to my parents and aunts who were also tall and quickly noticed how I seemed to always want to hide,and took it upon themselves to affirm me, with time I 'chose' not to let those get to me.

Recently, I heard a young girl aged 7 say to a 6 year old girl who was quite chubby 'I despise your fatness'. Where did she get such an idea from?

I perfectly agree that we need to be careful what we say to our kids and other kids and what we expose them to. Truth is that the streotypes exist all over the media and our balance comes from filtering out what they hear and believe.

Comparing two sisters and saying one is prettier than the other when both young girls are right there may not be a good idea. It is okay to have the opinion, but to disregard the girl's feelings and say it simply because one can, I do not consider okay. The tactless statements people made to me jokingly oftentimes as a child about being tall and skinny hurt and I still remember, although I'm glad that I rose above them.

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