Laughter is the Best Medicine

The joke below is on relationships, and I got it from one of those crazy forums, :) Enjoy...

There are three women. One is dating, one is engaged, and one is married. They decide to get kinky with their men and really pull out all the stops to make it extra special. The woman who is dating says, “Okay, so I bought black leather, red lipstick, fishnet stockings, and really got crazy. He loved it so much he thinks he’s in love.” The woman who is engaged says, “I showed up to his work after hours wearing only a red coat. Let’s just say he wants to move the wedding date up!” The woman who is married says, “Okay, I really went all out. I got a sitter for the kids and bought a black mask and a whip. My husband gets home, goes straight to the fridge and grabs a beer. Then he plops down on the couch and says, ‘HEY BATMAN! WHERE THE **** IS DINNER?!?”

"Laughter is the Best Medicine" blogfest is courtesy of Leigh at That's Write!

Here's how it works. On May 16, do the following: Post your favorite writer joke. If you don't have a writer joke (are there any?), post your favorite job-related joke. And if you don't have one of those (either writer- or work-related joke), post your favorite joke (or funny story).

Americans love the British Accent

Yesterday, Youtube was offering these new and free apps to make animated videos. In a moment of procrastination, I logged on and whiled away about thirty minutes to make the one below. Who else has noticed how much Americans love the British accent?



For the video, you get to choose your set, the actors, and most importantly your script (screen play and story). It was fun making it. I had like four takes before I got this version that I was happy with.

What do you think?

Blogger lost my post!

Sorry if you commented on a different post. That wasn't ready for the spotlight yet.

I noticed that blogger has been having problems since yesterday when I couldn't do my blog rounds or post comments on my own blog. When I got email notifications of comments here, I clicked over and noticed that blogger has mixed up everything. They lost my post, and put up a draft. Even half of the comments on the last two posts are gone!

My apologies while I try to get back my post. I composed it all on blogger here so it's not on my system. Remind me never to do that again. Any idea anyone on how to recover it?

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UPDATE - From Bloggers Blog

Crying at Weddings - Jumping the Broom (Movie)

People, I don't know what's happening to me these days o. I've always been a romantic but I viewed weddings with a more practical eye. After all, they're just one day in a couple's life and is usually a fiesta to satisfy society and make their families proud. But recently, I've found my heart melting at pictures of weddings, and after I almost shed tears this weekend at the cinema for Jumping the broom, I had to write about it.

Of course I love and devour Mills&Boons, and oh and ah over those epilogues where they have a beautiful wedding, same as in the romantic comedies. But never to the extent of crying! It all started with the wedding websites, and then the Bellanaija wedding features, and then guess what? I saw a clip of Prince William and Kate exchanging their wedding vows and almost teared up. It reminded me so much of my own wedding, it was such a typical Anglican wedding (well, except that the Prince did not want a ring). Since then, I've been watching myself, and waiting to see if it was a one off. Turns out it wasn't.

Frequently Asked Questions - Authorhouse Publishing

So I have a contact me link on both this blog and on my website too, and often I receive emails from various people. Some of the mails are just to say congrats, ask where they can get my books, and so on. But a lot of the emails are usually asking about blogging or self-publishing, and I have decided to start a series here and share some of these information. While removing any personal identifiers, I believe that some of the questions and answers will be of use to a wider audience than just the person asking.

To start off, I'll be answering questions on Authorhouse. Read on and I'll answer any follow-on questions if you leave them in the comments...
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Hi Myne, (I like this name)

My sis recommended your book, i am yet to read the book but i just wanted to congratulate you on actually finishing and publishing the books. I write childrens' books as well, i have been writing them for about two years now and i am still unpublished; due to the fact that i just don't "get" self publishing; don't laugh :-) I see you have published through Lulu and Authorhouse; may i please pick your brain on which of these two is the better option for a first time publisher? I have approached Authorhouse and they are willing to publish my books even before reading it you see, that is part of why i don't get it. I am confident that (by the Grace Of God) my books will sell, i just thought that they should at least read them first. Am i being old fashioned? Do tell me what you think please, i most definitly will appreciate your advise a great deal. Thanks for your time. See, just like you, i don't know how to talk small, please pardon the long letter ;-) Regards,

Dear XXX,

Thank you for visiting my website and for your email.

Self publishing is really hard work and I'm not even talking of recouping my investment yet. I prefer Authorhouse to Lulu because they're more experienced and with wider reach. So they're responsible for making the book available to online retailers, mine is to promote and keep it out there. I'm trying my best but it's easier that I don't have a full time job.

Authorhouse publishes children's books too and you are the one who pays for it. That is why they're not bothered to read it before accepting to go ahead. They do not pay you, you make money when you sell the books. When you are ready, you send them the electronic copy, that is what they work with. And it has to be the complete manuscript.

I hope that helps and all the best in your writing efforts. Let mem know if you have any more questions.

Best Regards,

Myne Whitman

MWP - The Familiar Smell by Makuochi Okafor

This episode of Myne Whitman Presents is a short story by Makuochi, a young writer, and a graduate of the University of Nigeria, Nsukka (B.sc). He loves Music, Dance, Arts and Nature. He blogs at www.sugarabc.blogspot.com. His literary works has been published both on print and online media including Naijastories.com. .

Below is his haunting story of a blind young girl and her experience of love. The first time he sent it to me, it was unedited, filled with typos and I stopped reading by the second paragraph. I told him my impressions and he apologized and promised to work on it. This final version is not perfect by any means but I got the story. I loved how the writer let out the details slowly and pulled me along as I read.

Enjoy and tell me what you think...

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Dear diary,

Pardon me for not updating lately; I’ve been very busy recently, rehearsing my keys for my live performance with Asa. Today is a memorable day for me and I have promised myself that I must tender you my story in shorthand.

Today makes it exactly one year that I met Ifeanyi. I still remember vividly that very morning, I woke early and while I had breakfast I overheard Ellen DeGeneres talking on the television, excited about the coming holiday- St. Valentine’s Day, she was talking about how valentine comes with magic. She spoke so convincingly that I believed her. I went to school that morning expectant; I had been infected with Ellen’s excitement. I waited for the magic, but nothing came. Nothing spectacular happened. Nothing magical, except for a rather strong, strange smell in class. Amidst all the perfumes and scents in class. I could perceive a difference. This scent was strong, manly and well, very angry. I loved it because it was a mystery for my nostrils to interpret. From it, I knew one sure fact; that someone me had joined our class that day. I heard it was a boy.

Charly Boy - Commercial Waist

Something to while away the weekend with.

By the way, why do young, beautiful women (video vixens?) continue to appear in these music videos that have no respect for women. In this one, Charly Boy (a father and grandfather of women) seems to be saying that commercial waist is what all women are. I don't blame him, when for a fee, the dancers are willing to wind the waist for him.

Enjoy the weekend my people and see you on Monday. Take care.

Relationship 15 - I have to drop it.

So I was reading about Jessica Simpson in the Stand Up to Cancer Naija Blog and the article was about her wedding being postponed because she had to lose the relationship 15. As I read what relationship 15 they were referring to, I began to nod my head. According to that post, relationship 15 "where you gain 15 pounds thanks to late night dinners with your S.O." I googled the phrase, could it be this was a common occurence and I thought it was just me?

I have gained about 8 pounds since I got married, and it's not just from being a writer and working from home. There's also that I'm cooking more regularly, and eating more. When I was single, I used to eat mostly once a day, and munch and snack fruits the rest of the time. Now I eat twice a day while still munching. And not only that, I somehow think dishing a man's food makes me get a larger portion too. Does that even make sense?

Anyway, I have determined to drop at least 5 pounds before the end of summer. And I'm glad I said it here on the blog, I think it will make me more accountable. Wish me luck!

25 Questions Tag

Hi everyone, so I'm back. Not that I've been gone that long but I missed you guys. Anyway, I came across this meme and decided to do it. Feel free to take the questions and answer on your own blog. I hope we can share the blog love...

1. Do you have any pets?
No pets, unless you count the many fish, cats, and hamsters I feed during my rounds to various blogs. LOL...

2. Name 3 things that are physically close to you.
Laptop, cup of water, table lamp.

3. What's the weather like right now?
Cloudy, and a bit cold at 51 degrees

4. Do you drive? If so have you crashed?
Yes and no, never crashed, hope I never do.

5. What time did you wake up this morning?
6.33am, I am a lark. You know 'early to bed and early to rise'. Even when I do go to bed late, I still wake up early, it's a habit.

6. When was the last time you showered?
This morning. I'm not one for baths.

7. What was the last movie you saw?
Rio - fantastic animated feature, with a great love angle.

8. What does your last text message say?
it is one from my sweetie and sorry I can't share it here, hehehe...

9. What's your ringtone?
Allomorphic expressions or something like that.

10. Have you ever been to a different country?
Many different countries - UK, Germany, Switzerland, USA, Canada, - all in the last 5 years.

Z is for Zinfandel

Zinfandel is a variety of black wine grape grown in California and from which a type of red wine is made. Why this word for today? Join me to toast to the successful completion of the A - Z Challenge!

It has been a hectic ride, lol...and I'm happy I stuck to the end. Congrats to all the other challengers, and thanks to everyone who has been following and commenting. To all my new followers, you're welcome and I'll be back to regular programming soon.

In the meantime, I'm taking a couple of days off! :)

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Picture from http://www.ryhanestate.com/scripts/wineList.cfm